Solitary Brooooooother!

Yes, I am listening to Killer. It is fit. And yes, there is a part of me that wants to live.

So anyway, I'm sad. And just sneezed. This makes me sadder. And it's raining. And I've overdosed on cake. Sadsadsad.

Basically I'm sad because I have no friends. This is of course a total exaggeration, I have plenty of friends. But they're all English. And I guess the people at the Studienkolleg will become more friend-like as time goes by. But I want to make some at uni. I have so few classes, and don't actually take part in any proper degree structure, so I'm just this random outsider who sits there and then leaves at the end. Alone. While they all talk and chat to each other. In German. It is well depressing. I mean, the classes are really fun and stuff. I'm thinking Finnish and Hungarian was a fabulous idea. But I just dunno how to MEET people. I can't function in a university that doesn't have a college structure. Since I don't actually live in uni accomodation and never have small-group classes or supervisions, I don't really feel any connection to the other students or the institution as a whole. How do people at normal universities make friends? Or do they not? Is this adulthood? It this the wonder of being part of the most mobile generation ever created by our individualist society? Is this what it means to have the world at my feet, bursting with opportunity?

Coz it just smells a bit like solitude and no matter how much cake I eat it still tastes like disappointment.

Bleergh. I am already so over my whining. Just shut up Bryn. Apologies.

Bryn
xxxx